Mightless Guy
by Ciotog
Summary: Kakashi shows Lee some things about Might Guy... things that makes Lee lose his faith in Guy. Obviously Guy bashing story.


The Illusion that was Might Guy

By Ciotog

Lee raced into the restaurant, a streak of green that narrowly avoided running into patrons and waiters. He was looking for Guy sensei, who had not met Lee at the training site as agreed. Knowing that this was Guy's favorite restaurant, mostly for its green interior and delicious steak, Lee impatiently glanced around. It took him a moment to pick out his sensei from the wallpaper, but then he spotted him. Guy was standing at a table, apparently talking to Kakashi, who was there with the rest of Team 7. Lee quickly worked his way through the maze of tables. Lee arrived in time to see Kakashi pull out his little red book, which apparently upset Guy who now started yelling.

''C'mon Kakashi. You have to give me a chance to close the gap.'' Lee realized Guy was talking about his and Kakashi's 'rivalry'. Kakashi didn't even look up when he responded.

''Guy, the score stands at one hundred to forty nine in my favor. How will winning one challenge close the gap?''

''So it has been a bad week…''

''More like a bad month, Guy.''

Guy was now jumping up and down in his frustration. ''Kakashi, I won't lose to you. C'mon first person to hop on one foot from here to the Hokage's tower.''

Kakashi sighed and looked up. ''Seems like your getting senile Guy. We did that two days ago.''

Lee leapt to his sensei's rescue. ''Kakashi, if my sensei says he can beat you, he can.''

Apparently Kakashi had noticed Lee before now, but Lee's comment only made him chuckle. ''Lee you place too much faith in Guy. Believe me, if you knew more about him you would be shocked. Honestly Guy, I'm shocked you keep so much from your pupil''

Guy made an attempt to speak but was cut off by Lee. ''You lie Kakashi. My sensei would never keep a secret from me. I dare you to prove me wrong.''

Kakashi let out another sigh. ''Very well.'' These words had hardly left Kakashi's mouth when a kuni whizzed through the air aimed at Guy's head. Guy ducked but not fast enough. The kuni buried itself in the far wall of the restaurant, pinning Guy's wig to the wall. Everyone in the restaurant turned slowly from the wig to Guy himself. Just like his teeth, Guy's head sparkled in the light. Lee's mouth was now embedded into the restaurant floor. Guy slowly backed away from Kakashi.

''Hey Kakashi… that's enough…''

Even through his mask, it was plain Kakashi was grinning. ''No Guy, I think you pupil should know everything.''

Like lightning Kakashi's hand shot out and grabbed Guy in a headlock. A few moments he released Guy, and in Kakashi's hand were Guy's incredibly shiny dentures. Lee's jaw was now through the floor and into the dirt below the building. Lazily Kakashi tossed the teeth onto the table. ''Still have faith in your sensei Lee?'' Lee nodded. At least Guy was still a powerful fighter.

Kakashi picked up Guy, who had fallen on the floor in shock, and rummaged through his vest. A second later he dropped Guy back on the ground and tossed something to Lee. Lee glanced at the object and nearly fainted. In his hands were several inflatable muscles. Guy looked really pitiful. He was skinny, bald, and toothless. The restaurant was filled with sniggers and stares. Kakashi bent down and ripped off Guy's leg warmers. Instead of weights, they were filled with chocolate and lollipops. The sniggers became outright laughter. Guy could no longer stand it and made a break for the door. He was stopped by Kakashi's hand on his ear. Kakashi looked at Lee. ''Seen enough?''

Lee shook his head. His faith in Guy was crushed, and now he wanted to know what else Guy had been hiding. Kakashi immediately pulled an object off of Guy's shirt, which turned out to be a pocket protector. Other objects on Guy's person included several romance novels, a baby blanket, more candy, and a fanny pack. When the fanny back was revealed people in the restaurant ran and screamed in terror. Kakashi even seemed freaked out. ''Guy, how could even you sink so low as to wear this.'' However Kakashi allowed Guy to run off, apparently deciding to be merciful.

After staring at the objects on the table and the wig still pinned to the wall Lee bowed to Kakashi. ''I'm sorry I ever doubted you Kakashi Sensei. I will now dedicate myself to studying your teachings.'' With that Lee raced off, mumbling something about finding a mask and heading to the book store.

The implications of what he had done slowly sank into Kakashi and filled him with dread. Lee trying to be like him? Following him around and dressing like him?

Kakashi opened his mouth and screamed in terror.


End file.
